Nicely Put.

Hold Ya Head
Woman hold her head and cry
Cause her son had been shot down in the street and died

Woman hold her head and cry
Cause her son had been shot down in the street and died

When I die, fuck it I wanna go to hell
Cause I'm a piece of shit, it ain't hard to fuckin' tell
It don't make sense, goin' to heaven wit' the goodie-goodies
Dressed in white, I like black Tims and black hoodies
God will probably have me on some real strict shit
No sleepin' all day, no gettin my dick licked
Hangin' with the goodie-goodies loungin' in paradise
Fuck that shit, I wanna tote guns and shoot dice
All my life I been considered as the worst
Lyin' to my mother, even stealin' out her purse
Crime after crime, from drugs to extortion
I know my mother wished she got a fuckin' abortion

Woman hold her head and cry
Cause her son had been shot down in the street and died

I swear to God I just want to slit my wrists and end this bullshit
Throw the Magnum to my head, threaten to pull shit
And squeeze, until the bed's, completely red
I'm glad I'm dead, a worthless fuckin' buddah head
The stress is buildin' up, I can't,
I can't believe suicide's on my fuckin' mind
I want to leave, I swear to God I feel like death is fuckin' callin' me
Naw you wouldn't understand
You see its kinda like the crack did to Pookie, in New Jack
Except when I cross over, there ain't no comin' back
Should I die on the train track, like Remo in Beatstreet
People at the funeral frontin' like they miss me
My baby momma kissed me but she glad I'm gone
She knew me and her sister had somethin' goin' on
I wonder if I died, would tears come to her eyes?
Forgive me for my disrespect, forgive me for my lies

Woman hold her head and cry
Cause her son had been shot down in the street and died

I reach my peak, I can't speak,
call my nigga Chic, tell him that my will is weak
I'm sick of niggaz lyin', I'm sick of bitches hawkin'
Matter of fact, I'm sick of talkin'

Too Drunk.

im drunk as fuck and i hate someone cause they didnt keep the promise and they went to bed so they got fucked with then they retaliated but went out of line. ive decided i drink too much and ive decided im not drinking for a while cause of the way that shit went. i had fun up until it went too far now im just pissed as fuck. . and you shouldnt be pissed when youre drunk and this girl named natalie is being sketchy and jewsbocks must not love jewlee cause its 2 45 in the morning and i didnt talk to her so imma go kill myself with my stupid knife. and also noone reads my stupid journal shits anyway so i should just kill them too. o ya, my new sweatshirt that bob gave me today is broken cause it has shaving cream and ketchup and mustard and red stuff and somethin else all over it and that makes me wanna rape the devil right in his stupid shiny black and red ass. i hate you mom. fuck you all. die you stupid homos. go to god. before god goes to you. kill yourself before death kills you.

About Me.

im white + i smoke kools but im not black + i listen to reggaeton but im not a mexican + i like chinese food but im not chinese + i could eat gummi bears everyday + one day ill be a famous dj. look for me + i love my friends + you cant label me + i like to write + i like to write poems + i like to cook + i have a license + i dont have a car + i like to work + i dont have a job + my cat died + she was the shit + people judge me + i try not to judge them + cancer is dumb + i am a christian + im not religious + i am a republican + i agree with bush + i am obsessive + i am compulsive + i am obsessive-compulsive + i am afraid of whales + i am afraid of heights + i am afraid of spiders + i have dreams + i like to take pictures + my camera was stolen + im learning to not love my possesions + i like to walk + ive broken peoples hearts + ive had my heart broken + love isnt as good as youve heard + the cops have my fingerprints + people look at me weird when i go to stop & shop + im supposed to wear glasses + i had braces + i have a patellar tracking disorder + i love baby blue + italian dressing is the shit + it goes with everything + one day ill go to the uk + i wish i knew spanish better + avril lavigne is my girlfriend + tego calderon is my homie + i have sleeping problems + i think too much + i love apple juice + some people call me jewsbocks + some people call me prophet + i beatbox + i rap + not very well but i do + i hate posers + be yourself + i want a pet greyhound + i want a pet skunk + i want to meet new people + send me a message.

Drunk. Skunks. Gummis.

codys drunk as fuck. he sleeps with one eye open. then he rolls around. black cherry smirnoff smells like gummis. its sexy. im drunk like a skunk. cody ate my dinner that david made for me. hes drunk. david wants to be drunk too. he is. cigarmette time. k bye. love.  heineken smells like cow piss. it really does.

Another Poem.

i cared for you
i was there for you
i dispaired for you
noone compared to you
now youre gone
and i feel so out of place
its been so long
i can hardly see your face
the past has passed
the present wont last
the future is near
and im stuck here

La Escritura En Español.

me gusta escribir en español. es un gran tiempo. escribo en español porque soy el mexicano más blanco que usted verá jamás. tego calderon es mi mejor amigo. él fuma hierba conmigo. adoro osos viscosos.

Chances.

i think. thats what i do. i think more bad comes of it than good, but either way i have to deal with it. i think about shit in the past. i think of how shit was. i think of  how shits changed. i dont like a lot of the changes. a lot of the people i knew, and let know me, are gone. i feel like they dont care. i know they have their own problems, and lives and shit to deal with. . but i feel like theyve abandoned me. have you ever regreted not taking a chance on something? not doing something so that things wouldnt change and things wouldnt get weird? not at least trying so that things would stay familiar. maybe change is good. im normally not afraid of change, yet for some reason in this circumstance i was. in this situation i felt it better to not take it a step further and make it more. i didnt want what we had to be different. i didnt want shit to get weird. i didnt want to lose the strong friendship we already had. but its gone now, and i dont know why. maybe that chance i was too worried to take could have worked. maybe not. but now shits different. its better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all. maybe thats why it hurts.

Jail (For Real This Time).

one time i went to jail. it was fuckin great. this one dude kept threatening me and trying to get the cops to come grab me on my warrant, but they never came. i was sketched out anyway. finally i went and turned myself in. i went and a lot of the cops there knew me. thats no good at all. i met this kid named jay while i was there. he was there cause he had three warrants and his friend turned him in. the cops found an uncapped needle in his back pocket. they were pissed. he was tweaked the fuck out and he started comin down that night. by the next morning he was yellin and screamin bout how he was cold and tellin people to help him. i felt a lil bad. by that point i finally had a blanket and jay got his takin away for fuckin with it, so i gave mine to him cause it was cold. a lil while later three cops came runnin down yellin at him to give them the blanket cause he was tryin to hang himself with it. he ruined it for both of us. neither of us were allowed a blanket the rest of the time. i didnt eat shit but a lil bit of a nasty cornbread muffin thingy and some nasty cold coffee. jay ended up gettin bailed out at like 4 00 that afternoon and i had to stay. the next morning i went to court and the cop fucked up my elbow. then i got to see a judge and my best friend owen who came with my brother to bond me out. owens a good dude, somethin more for him to hold over my head. then i went back to his house and chilled for the night and did a paper route. then i came back to winsted. last night natalie flipped out at mat and did some shit. thats no good. people you dated arent worth shit. o well. the world is a funny place. jail can go to hell though. . its too cold.